'Babe... HE'S HERE!'


Theo's first picture
The instantaneous love you feel is nothing I can explain. It's indescribable! You can ignore most of the goop they're covered in when it's your own! It had to be the most amazing experience of my whole life, and I feel so lucky to be as fortunate enough to have actually given birth. 

But the reality of delivery is never too far away.. 

'Sophie, we need to deliver the placenta.'

Oh man, really?! I'm just getting over labour and now this. I'm given an injection to help my body contract again. The pressure builds up in just the same way and I'm expected to push. It wasn't anywhere near as bad as delivering a baby, but oh my, the placenta is huge. Why would anyone ever want to eat? The nutritional value is irrelevant to me! 

And, again, I'm pretty relieved; thank god that's over... 

'Sophie, we need to stitch you up!'

So more injections, a few extra lights pointing places you wish they weren't, and bye bye goes the end of the bed. My legs are in stirrups, so you can imagine it wasn't my most dignified moment. When you're not in anywhere near as much pain, and your delivery is over, it feels pretty awkward.. It’s like when you're in labour, you become a bit delirious, but as soon as your bubba is out, you snap back...

'Has anyone ever joked about getting the extra stitch..?' I say...

My husband looks shocked... A seriously long silence ensues. 


Again, people closest to me know that I love an awkward moment. This will be etched in my mind forever, almost as vividly as giving birth! Brilliant!

My dad was at home, wide awake despite the hour, and I really wanted him to be there to meet his first grandchild. He came down immediately! Now that is dedication.

Believe it or not, I had asked my dad to be there during my labour. That may seem strange to you, but I was really fortunate growing up to have spent a lot of time with him. My mum worked super hard for us as a family, and my dad did too, of course, by staying at home to raise my brother and I! So I get to have this amazing bond with my mum, and with my dad.. 
He did obviously refuse; 'Come on now, Soph.. that's a bit weird! I'll come down as soon as he's born okay?'

So along comes the teeniest little thing in the whole world that manages to flip your life on its head in a moment. And it is amazing... but it comes along with a lot of worry and immediate responsibility! I was so shocked at how overwhelmed I felt, to begin with. It could only have been exasperated by the fact that I was taken straight to the post-natal ward... alone! Just me and Theo. Off went my husband, my mum and my dad.

I remember thinking how quiet it was, despite the fact that there were clearly lots of babies on the ward. I was the last delivery, and ended up with my own room… Being alone in there led to a lot of thinking time, and staring, and hugging, and kissing. Those first moments are lovely, unforgettable, because it's just you and your baby. You know it will all change as soon as the visitors start to pile in! 

'I ain't moving, mumma'
The pain relief starts to where off, and I’ve gotta say, I was really uncomfortable. I want to take this moment to applaud all women for what we go through, and if you haven’t, for what you will go through; but those out there that have had a caesarean. Well done! I don’t know how you cope, because for me, it was bad enough having stitches in my lady bits, never mind a major operation across my stomach.

My husband’s parents come to visit, along with my nan and mum and it’s beautiful to see them hold Theo, and fall in love with him as quickly as I did. My husband is allowed to be there with us all day, so from 10am until 9pm but I’m very aware of the fact that I have another night heading towards me, alone with my bubba. 
I loved being with Theo, but in all honesty, I’ve just met him. I’m trying to learn how he ticks and I never want to do anything that may throw him off or disrupt a natural pattern. I’m trying to suss out exactly how my first night will go with him. Fear of the unknown and lack of control drives me crazy! And that is definitely highlighted when you have a baby, so I'd like to think I'm more relaxed these days... (*unsure face*)

I’m breast feeding, and obviously the hospital do not allow you to have your baby in bed with you if you fall asleep… understandably (I guess!) Theo will not lie in his own crib, he wants to lay with me. All night.
This is when I welcomed my first night of NO SLEEP! Not a minute of it.. and it’s the night I always go back to if he ever has a bad night’s sleep now.
 I remember how exhausted I was. I’d cleaned the fridge at 2am the first of three nights with little sleep, moved house then my waters broke at 3am, and I gave birth at 4:50am.. Never at reasonable hours! I was the walking dead!
The nurses were amazing though. One did offer to take Theo from me for a few hours so I could catch up on sleep, but I couldn’t bear to be away from him. He’d been in my tummy for so long and was now here. I didn’t want him going anywhere even if it meant staying up all night.

It took me weeks to catch up on all those hours missed, but my husband has been an amazing support to me and it did happen eventually! There is always light at the end of the tunnel, and everything seems ten times worse with no sleep but you do get it back. And not a day since have I felt as tired as I did then! So that helps me come back down to earth if I’m ever whinging.

It’s departure day. I was desperate to get Theo home so I can start getting us into routine, and for him to get used to the place. I’m pushing the nurses constantly to come in and discharge us. Due to the type of delivery, and the fact that he was distressed during contractions, he was monitored consistently throughout our stay in hospital and needed to be checked over by a paediatrician before we were allowed to leave.

He had his temperature checked, heart rate, skin colour, breathing, hips, eyes. The works! And she was pleased with him. Relief is nice a feeling!

So in comes the husband, with the car seat, and his fluffy onesie ready to go.

Home time here we come!

‘Theo… let’s get you home baby!’

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